Wednesday, February 2, 2011

i'm standing here, you don't mind do you?

I find it interesting the ways people find to impose themselves on other people. There are the obvious and common things like talking too loudly on your cell phone in a restaurant, taking too many groceries through the express line at the grocery store or texting during a movie at the theater. But probably what bugs me more than the little irritating things that happen all the time are the smaller, less frequent things that you can't get away from.

I'm not a frequent wearer of cologne and maybe I'm annoying and stink all the time but I can't decide if it's worse to stink all the time or smell like you bathed in cologne twice before you left the house. It seems like the worst offenders are little old ladies who are out for a night on the town. Maybe it's that their sense of smell has gone south and so they just keep putting it on and putting it on or maybe the older the perfume gets, the more pungent it gets? In a close race for second on the worst offenders list are teenage boys. It's almost like they think they'll be better looking if the whole world can smell them from 6 miles away.

I've never understood wind chimes. Is it that you really need to know when the wind is blowing? Was it the only souvenir you could find to bring back from your trip to Kansas? Do you enjoy torturing your neighbors? I'm not trying to be funny, someone please explain them to me? If you like the sound of the chimes so much, why put them outside for everyone else to "enjoy"? Why not hang them in your house near a ceiling fan or an open window and experience the full range of their resonance for yourself?

The reason I don't have a dog is because I don't want to have to clean up after it. That's the ONLY reason! The second only reason is because I don't want to have to listen to it bark during all hours of the day and night. What is the polite way to say, "shut your dog up or I'll cut out its voice box"?

No comments: